You know what happens when you do something you know you shouldn't do?

You get diarrhea.

Let me explain.

I'm vegan. That's not news. I don't eat meat in any form because it's gross. The thought of eating meat makes me sad and sick. Except that I messed up. On Saturday Jacob went to dinner to celebrate his birthday and where did we go? A SUSHI RESTAURANT. Yeah, Jacob loves sushi. But I do too. I did. Not now. Fuck. It tasted amazing.

But it hurt my stomach. I know it wasn't because of the quality of the food. Jacob didn't have stomach troubles and we ate the same things.

You know what it was? GUILT. Plain ol' mother fucking guilt. My body wasn't used to having to digest something like that which was also the reason I felt like shit. Or, I shit because I felt like shit.

All I know is that it is not worth it. My body has decided that regardless of my personal beliefs about meat that it will no longer handle it with anything other than turmoil. Because you know what? Just thinking about it hurts my stomach so why should digesting it cause less pain?