Thursday, April 1, 2010
Sweater hams - not something you're likely to see at Easter dinner.
I have always been fascinated by breasts.
Boobs.
Ta-tas.
Tits.
Fun bags.
Just kidding about that last one. I'm not a ten-year-old boy.
I remember having the smallest breasts of all of my friends in junior high. I felt like the thing that made me a WOMAN (a thirteen-year-old woman?) was missing. I was a late bloomer. So what?
I finally got a decent-sized rack when I was fifteen but I swear to you, dear readers, my boobs have NEVER been perky. I have never been able to get away with not wearing a bra. I should have purchased stock in Victoria's Secret.
When I got pregnant my boobs went from a nice and reasonable C cup to a fabulous porn-esque D cup.
Hubby was happy. I was happy. They looked AWESOME in low-cut tops and I finally had some sexy cleavage.
And then I gave birth. And with that came my milk. And a size E nursing bra.
E. As in A B C D DD...E. Did you know that you can't just walk into any ol' lingerie store and purchase a 40E bra? I also used to be a 36 but that's neither here nor there.
I can't buy my bras at Victoria's Secret. That icon of female sexuality is off-limits for me and my giant sweater hams.
I've been nursing for a year and after hearing about how your breasts go back to their pre-baby size while you're still nursing I knew that this was not going to be my luck. I was going to be stuck with E's forever. And while I thought I'd enjoy having such large tits I find that it's a total pain in the ass. I have to wear tops that are somewhat low-cut because a higher neckline just emphasizes the beasts' already massive size.
I hope that when I start to lose some weight that my boobs will shrink a little bit. That might just be wishful thinking but hey, a girl can dream, can't she?
This is truly a perfect example of the circle of life. Or maybe two circles. Two GIANT CIRCLES THAT KEEP ME FROM BEING ABLE TO RUN OR WEAR A STRAPLESS DRESS.
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8 comments:
Listen, until you have a "stud" and a "dud," I don't want to hear it. One of my boobs swelled to massive size (for 2 whole days) while the other went nowhere. Do you have any idea how absurd that is?
Now I have one deflated, still two big boob, and one remained small boob. And both sprouted hair.
So, again. Shuddup woman!
Dude, once your done having babies you are might want to have a breast reduction. Abby had to have one last summer for the same reason. My Boobs never went down either I went from a full B to a full C.
I went from a DD to a G then an H while attempting to nurse. Since it didn't work they went down to a DDD...still too big for me and just big enough that I can't shop anywhere but online. I, like you am hoping if there is some weight loss they will go down a bit.
Mine went up exactly the same sizes - from a B to a D and then when they got bigger than D I just gave up trying to find bras. Now they have gone down to some weird size that is bigger than a C but smaller than a D and NOTHING FITS. I have bras in every single size and none of them fit, my boobs look ridiculous. I give up.
I didn't have boobs till I was 20 ..seriously so I've always had perky boobs even when they became C's ..then the big pregnant D's & now the massive 36 E's that I'm toting ..yep they're still perky..but one is starting to get bigger than the other b/c my LO has a favorite one..I sorta miss my little boobs though!
I soooo know where you are coming from. I have a size that isn't even in the first quarter of the alphabet and I have never been pregnant. I found you through LadyWanderlust and I am glad I checked you out!
Oh me too! Well, not E, but bigger than before pregnancy. Mine did not get smaller until I got serious about exercise last year. My husband was quite sad that some of the weight I lost came from my boobs. But I was thrilled! It was annoying to have to buy bigger shirts just because my boobs were bigger. I'm having my sixth baby in a few weeks and I'm kind of sad that I'll be back in a bigger cup size. Hopefully I'll lose it all though, after nursing.
I'm another never-been-perky-bewbed woman. ;p
I'm not a mom, so I can't speak to that aspect of it, but my cup size has fluctuated with my weight.
So, good luck!
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